An Itch

Embarrassing myself in public once again.

Apr 13, 2023

Will I ever stop embarrassing myself in public?

Probably not.

It’s spring in Victoria, the kind of weather where it’s not quite warm enough to give up a spring jacket entirely.

I’m walking to the university, which is about a 50-minute walk from my apartment. Fifteen minutes into the walk, my back gets sweaty under my jacket and heavy backpack.

An itch starts to form in the middle of my back where I absolutely cannot reach it with my coat on and likely would not be able to reach it with my coat off either.

I look around for somewhere to attend to the itch, which is increasing in severity with every second.

I spot a telephone pole and stand near it waiting while several cars pass so they won’t see me. When I think the coast is clear, I drop my backpack and lean my back on the pole and proceed to relieve the itch which is now actually painful in it’s intensity.

Closing my eyes, I continue to rub my back on the pole. As the itch dissipates, I moan in relief. There is nothing quite so pleasurable as relieving oneself of an uncomfortable itch.

Then I hear the jingle of a dog leash. I open my eyes and a few feet to my right a man and his dog are staring at me.

“I have an itchy back,” I say peeling myself off the pole.

“Yes, and you have many layers on,” he says helping me normalize my behavior.

“I was hoping no one would see me.”

He laughs kindly, and we go our separate ways.

Kathryn Mockler’s debut story collections Anecdotes is forthcoming from Book*hug. Pre-order Anecdotes at your local bookstore.

A maxi pad taped to a yellow wall over which the text Anecdotes by Kathryn Mockler

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